WARNING: this article contains extremely graphic and disturbing images. I will put the pictures at the bottom, if you do not want to see them do not scroll to the very bottom.
Jaislamer India:
I was staying at a hotel in this small town in the desert, very close to the Pakistan border. I went out for a walk in the morning. As i was strolling down the street i noticed this injured dog. There are a lot of stray dogs in India, and a lot of them do have injuries, mostly limping, but this was by far the most horrific injury i had encountered.
This sweet little dog was limping down the street, with half its face missing. The entire side of his face was just gone, and was being swarmed with flies. I cannot even begin to imagine how much pain this dog must have been in. And i do not want to even think about how the dog got the injuries. I was astonished to see this dog limping past people, and everyone just ignored him. I realize that people in this country are used to seeing injured dogs, and they also do not generally see stray dogs the same way i do, as threy are taught from a young age to stay away from them; but i still could not believe how any with even an ounce of humanity could just look past such a horrific injury. At this point i had been in India for one month, but at this moment i could not even try to blend in or keep my head down. I broke. I turned towards a group of men that the dog limped by and i yelled “Why don’t any of you help?? How can you not even care??” They all looked at me like i was crazy, i imagine it is probably the first time they’ve been screamed at by a lone foreign girl.
I couldn’t just let this dog suffer, i had to do something. So i tried to follow him. He was obviously pretty scared and would not come up to me. He walked into a ditch and layed down in a puddle. I kneeled down on the ground close by and tried to figure out what the hell i could do. As i sat there and watched this dog suffer, i could not hold back my tears. So there i was, on the side of the street, kneeling on the ground, bawling my eyes out. When the locals saw a white girl on the ground crying they all came up to see what was happening. Next thing i know there’s about 20 men standing there asking me whats wrong. I explained to them that i needed to somehow get this dog to a vet. A lot of them laughed at me, some told me to not bother, while some even got mad at me and said i should just leave things alone. A couple a guys translated this for me and i got so angry i yelled at some men to fuck off.
A group of men tried to help me, i don’t know if its because they actually wanted to help, or if they just wanted the excuse to be near the white girl (i am not trying to come off as cocky, Indian men are extremely fascinated with white girls). Thank god, two younger men came up and offered to help. They both rescue injured animals and bring them to the vet sometimes, and they said that they had been trying to help this dog for a week but could not get him to come near them. They offered to drive me to the vet so that i could speak to them and try and get the vet to come to the dog. The other guy stayed behind with the dog so we wouldn’t lose him. So i jumped on the back of some guys motorbike and we went to the vet.
The vet was not very helpful. They said that we would need to bring the dog to them. They gave me a sedative and a needle and told me to inject in into the dog so that we would be able to bring him back. So we ride back to where the dog was. At this point he was laying under a car. I drew up the medicine in the syringe and got down on my hands and knees and reached in. I was terrified to inject this dog, i was absolutely sure that he would bite me, even thought he had shown no aggression at all. He may have been missing half a face but he still had intact teeth. I gently petted him thigh, making sure he wouldn’t immediately snap at me, i then reach in and injected the needle. He didn’t even notice. We waited until the dog passed out, but this dog had a very strong will to live. He fought off the sedative and crawled out form under the car and limped off.
We followed the dog. Street after street we followed him, waiting for him to get to tired to keep going, but this dog, he wanted so badly to live. He shocked us, he kept pushing, kept walking. At some point i noticed that we had drawn a crowd again. There were about 15 men following us. At one point there was even a couple police officers that noticed the commotion and walked with us. I knew a lot of people were just there for the show: me, the crying white girl, but it was nice to have people at my back, that would help me.
The dog made his way into a park and finally laid down on the grass. We knew that we were not gonna be able to pick him up, because even though he had finally laid down, the dog just would not go to sleep, he was fighting with every fiber of his being to stay alive. So i hopped on the back of the guys bike again and we drove back to the vet. I came crashing into the vets office, i yelled and screamed, begged and pleaded. I walked right up to that group of men working and i showed them the pictures of the dog and i said “He is suffering an unimaginable amount of pain, please, please take 5 minutes of your time and help him.” FINALLY one of the vets agreed to come help. We rode back to the park.
The dog had started to doze off, the sedative really kicking in, but he was still fighting it. India is not a country where euthanasia is common at all, but i knew that this dog needed to be put down, there is nothing else anyone could do to stop his suffering. I begged the vet to stop his heart, and astonishingly enough i was able to convince the vet. This sort of thing does not happen in India, it was a miracle that i was able to convince them. The euthanasia process is a lot different then it is in my country. It unfortunately was not peaceful. The vet injected something into the dogs veins, the dog started kicking, weakly trying to get away from the needle. I jumped onto the ground and i held the dog. Blood got everywhere, the dog turned and thrashed trying with all of his might to crawl away, with every fiber of his being this dog wanted to live. I held him still, i got covered in blood. As the medication stopped his heart he started to have seizures, jerking around, terrified. I sat in blood and held him and cried and wished that i could have saved him.
Finally the seizures subsided. I sat there for a long time ,holding him and kissing him and crying my heart out for all to see. The people standing there watching looked disgusted, that i could be laying down in blood and kissing a dog with such gory injuries, but i did not care. There was even a few children there watching, and i hope that them watching me pour my heart out for a stray dog maybe taught them something. The two guys who helped me out through this kept saying “He’s gone, you can leave him now”. But i just kept saying “No just let me sit with him for a minute”. Finally i looked up and noticed about 30 people standing around watching me, and i just snapped and yelled “I hope you are all here because you care and not for a show”.
The two guys that had helped me out so much that day took me on their bike and brought me to a nearby store where they got a bottle of water and washed the blood off my hands. Then they took me to my hotel. I don’t think i would have been able to handle that day without their help and support.
Of all the things i have seen in life, this is one that has hit me the hardest, because even though i know it was the right thing to put down the dog, i still feel haunted that i took away his life. He fought so hard to live, and in the end the euthanasia wasn’t even peaceful, i will always remember holding him as he thrashed around in pain.
"It takes a great deal of courage to see the world in all its tainted glory, and still love it" 
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